A new Blossom!!

Mallory was concieved in April. The actual date not known, but it was estimated somewhere in the middle of the month.
 
                                       

Surprise!!

We found out we were pregnant shortly before Mother's Day in May. I had tought I was and took a few at home tests before confirming. I told Josh when he called home during a break at Oscar Mayer. He told Greg, and everyone instantly starting giving him a hard time, about the possibility of another girl in the house.

 

Mommy takes Mallory to her only concert at the Mississippi Valley Fair.  Mommy and Daddy had meet and great passes to meet Montgomery Gentry. We got autographs and Mommy told them she was carrying their "littlest fan" They signed an autograph to "Baby Park"

Mommy had an ultrasound  at Genesis East to check the due date. She was measuring a few weeks bigger. The ultrasound confirmed that she was still due January 17, 2006. The reason for being bigger was an excess of amniotic fluid. No problem they told us.

Mommy got a call at work from Dr. Wells saying that the reason for the excess of amiontic fluid was because there appeared to be an intestinal blockage (duedenal atresia). So she was scheduled to have a Level II ultrasound in Iowa City the next day. She was told that Mallory may need to have surgery shortly after birth to fix the blockage inorder to eat.

First Ultrasound in Iowa City

As soon as we got to Iowa City, they sent us to talk to the Genetic Specialists. We were then told that the blockage is most associated with Downs Syndrome. We then were taken to have the ultrasound. The radiologist took her pictures and measurements, then went to get the doctor. The doctor took a look at things again, and then told us what he had seen. There were numerous severe birth defects. Including but not limited to:

Heart Defect
Intestinal Blockage
Possible extra toes
Ambiguous Genitalia
The hands werent right
Limbs lagging in growth
Head enlarged

We were told it was most likely not Downs Syndrome and had an amniocentisis to confirm it. Which later came back copletely normal, and telling us that our baby was infact a Girl.

Over Night Stay in Iowa City

On December 1 we headed to Iowa City to reduce some of the fluid taken out. They drained about 2 liters by the same way they did the amnio. Afterwards they monitor the baby to make sure that it is tollerating the procedure. Normally it takes about 45 minutes. However the doctors werent seeing any accelerations in her heartbeat. They wanted to keep me overnight to monitor and said that if it looked like she was in distress they would have to do a c-section. Well night came and went and although they never saw what they were looking for they said it's possible that with her heart defect that this was "normal" for her. So they sent me home.

Pediatric Cardiologist

We met with the Dr. Vickie Pyevich, the pediatric cardiologist, to do an echocariogram of Mallory's heart. And to try to decipher what is wrong with it. The Dr. couldn't get a gook look at it in depth, but said it was a form of Tetralogy of Fallot. Where the bottom 2 chambers have a large hole in the wall, and the "clean" and "diry" blood mix and get sent to the wrong parts of the body. Plus one of the arteries was overgrown and ontop of the other one restricting blood flow. We were told that Mallory would need open heart surgery at 3-6 months of age.

 

Second Ultrasound in Iowa City
Mallory Falling Asleep

We returned to Iowa City for our next ultrasound to check fluid and take mearsurements. It was then appearent that Mallory had mulitple cysts on her brain. The Dr's were not sure of what they were exactly. Either a stroke, or just fluid on the brain, or her heart had been depriving her brain of blood for so long that the damaged parts had turned to fluid. We were told that she would need a MRI after birth to determine the extent of brain damage. After her death we were told that she was dying as we were watching her on the monitor. She was falling asleep and we didnt even know it.
                                                 

This night, I woke up and felt something was wrong. When Josh got home at 3 am I met him at the door, sat down on the sofa and I told him that I hadnt felt any movement. I wasnt sure if the excessive fluid was absoring the movement. But since we found out about her abnormalities in November I hadn't really felt much. Josh assured me that we would be in Iowa City the next day and we would check it out.

First High Risk OB appointment in Iowa City
Mallory Had Grown Her Wings

Early in the morning Josh, Sydney and I drove to Iowa City. This was the only time that Sydney had gone with us. We were going up just for an exam and to talk about our options regarding delivery. We met with the nurse and when it was time for the exam Josh and Sydney headed to the cafeteria for breakfast. I told the Dr that I hadnt felt any movement and she said with a smile on her face "Let's listen to that heart" She got out the doppler and moved all around my tummy looking for it. She assured me that the doppler was old and not to worry. We went down the hall, and she got the specialists to do an ultrasound. At this time they were paging over head for Josh to return. He returned as I was in tears. They started the ultrasound and I knew immediately. She was so still on the monitor. Her head was all black, full of fluid. Then they turned to us, and we knew. Josh and I wept in each others arms. 
             
              

Mallory's First Christmas

We didnt want to deliver Mallory on Christmas for the sake of Sydney and Tateum being at home. So we spent the holiday with as much cheer as possible. I carried Mallory through the holidays with us. She will always be here in spirit, but this Christmas, she was here in body as well.

                                                     

Mallory was Born into God's Arms

The day had finally come that we had to say goodbye. We checked into Genesis East. They put us in a room away from the other expectant mothers. The preist came in and we had a baptismal of intent done. They induced me slowly with pitocin. And at 9:29 pm she was in our arms. A little 4 lbs angel. She had a head full of dark thick hair. Her sisters' nose. And in fact 12 toes.  We shared the moment with our parents, and Mallory's Godfather,  Robert Gonzales Jr. We had her 1 short hour before they took her away.

    

Blossomed on Earth to Bloom in Heaven

Mallory's funeral was this day. Her visitation was held at Runge Mortuary. She had many gorgeous flower arrangements and plants. Isabel Bloom statues, and Willow Tree Angels. Her funeral procession took her to Our Lady of Victory church for her Mass. Her daddy Josh, and God Father, Uncle Roberts carried her up the aisle as "On Eagle's Wings" played. The sermon was given, and as we left "Amazing Grace" played. The bells tolled as we returned her to the limo. She rode in between her father and I to Mt Calvary cemetary. A breif service was given at the chapel and we left. Josh and I were taken back to our car at the cemetary and we drove back to the cemetary to see where her plot. At that time we saw them carrying her to her grave, and watched them shovel the dirt on.  She was in her final resting place.

                     

This day marks Mallory's 1st Angel Day. The day I gave birth to her. And the Day she awoke in Heaven. It was Josh's idea to make cupcakes. I really didnt know if I felt like 'Celebrating' As the day came to be, I helped Josh. We made a heart shaped one to take to her grave, and lit a candle that was shaped like a 1. We sat there as we waited for it to go out. Then we released balloons, and layed flowers. At 9:29 pm I lit her candle, and at 11:15 pm I blew it out. She was born at 9:29, and the nurses took her away at 11:15. Those short hours were the only moments we had with her, and got to hold her in our arms. I dont know what the following years bring...but I just know that as each yer takes me away from the moment that I last held her, it also takes me closer to the moment that I can hold her in Heaven.